you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
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