Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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