When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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