I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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