I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Randomize
