Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
Randomize
