You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
well you can't waste a boner
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
do herpes really smell.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
