shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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