You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
