He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
