Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
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