my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
wow bdsm is so cute
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
