As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Randomize
