yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Randomize
