I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
i believe in u and ur pee
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
