i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize