I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
Are my feet made of real feet?
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
