There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
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