Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
