Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Randomize