Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
last night I used snow as a chaser
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Randomize
