i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
