Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
Ladies, if you have recieved this text then you are one of the lucky few friends I have decided to make this proposal to. As you all know, my boyfriend's birthday is in two weeks and I have finally decided on the perfect present. Surprise threesome. Now, there can only be one, this isn't an orgy you know, so I will be rating the ideal candidates on bra size and sluttyness. Experiance will count, references if available. Inbox me your credentials so we can come to a...Satisfying agreement.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Fuck me I smell like cheese
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
