i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Randomize