I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
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