I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Randomize
