I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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