That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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