eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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