? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
