He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
