I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
