We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
as a side note pls kill me
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
