Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
I'm bleeding and have questions
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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