He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Randomize
