WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
