This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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