Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
I'm really sorry I called you a "smug, arrogant, boyfriend-fucking piece of defecation". I was super drunk.
I was going to be mad, but then I remembered you don't use autocorrect and spelled everything correctly and I was kinda impressed.
Randomize
