he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
