No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Randomize