hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
