Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
Randomize
