You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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