he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
