Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
