yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Randomize
