I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
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