you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
We're not piercing ourselves today.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
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