we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
3pm strippers are depressing
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
