the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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