This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
Randomize
